No More Lists!

Published in Geek Health by

I get a lot of e-mail.  I get the Toys’R’Us Newsletter (mock me later) I get e-mails from PF Chang’s and Apple and  I’m tired of it!  I’m going to launch a new campaign, a mission, a quest to unsubscribe to everything that has my e-mail address!  No more lists!

It started out fine, and I’d get a couple of e-mails a day but as an iPhone user I have the compulsion that I MUST check mail the second a little “1” appears on the mail icon.  When I waste that precious finger tap to find out it’s an e-mail from Babies’R’Us about a sale on diapers I get the urge to merge my phone with the nearest adjacent wall.

You distracted me over diapers?!  DIAPERS!?  My son is five years old!

I go into a nerd rage of epic keyboard mashing proportions before noticing my green glowing eyes in a near by mirror and calming down again.  Mailing List rage effects families of all sizes, and kills more people every year than Shark Attacks and Vending Machine related accidents COMBINED.

I think quite possibly all of the trouble in the Middle East would be resolved if they’d all just spend a little time clicking unsubscribe.  BOOM problem solved.  No more wasteful war spending and in one swift move both the economy is righted and global warming is resolved.  Mailing List rage.

So yes, in this bonus blog on a sunny Sunday Valentines Day I commit to you to click unsubscribe on all the garbage and only allow the e-mails I actually want to read to come into my inbox, and distract my iPhone from doing what it should be doing…

…playing Tetris.